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Friday, March 25, 2011

Getting to the heart of the matter...

Happy Friday Bloggy World! Friday is weigh-in day and I have lost another 3 lbs and this pleases me especially since I am getting a cold and I really had aspired to step up the exercise this week but frankly I just used all my energy preparing dinner for my family tonight.  That I think is one of the hardest things about this program, you have to purpose to be diligent to make better choices and be careful.  Of course it would be easier when I don't feel well to order a pizza for my family and stay permanently melted into the couch like I want to but it is costly.  That's a cost I no longer am willing to pay.

I wanted to talk tonight about getting to the heart of the matter of why we make some of the bad choices we do.  I have a two year old.  She is a pretty typical two year old.  Adorable, sweet, learning to talk in a way that makes everything she says cute even when it's naughty like when she looked at me today and gestured to the remote control and put out both her hands and said "Give it to me, Momma, give it to me, I have it." I admit she looked so serious I almost handed it over, the two year old cuteness is hard to resist.  Don't get me wrong, she has been learning how to be naughty too.   Here is an image...

This is what a time out looks like at our house!

She has this evasion technique that she is highly skilled at, if you ask her to come to see you so you can get her dressed or change her diaper she runs away from you and hides, then she will come back in your area after you call her several times but she will loop around the perimeter of the room with her back to you avoiding eye contact and keeping at all times out of arms reach, she will slowly loop closer and when she gets close you will try to grab her and sometimes she will dodge and dash back out to the outer perimeter again and begin the slow winding in all over again and sometimes you get lucky and you nab and scoop her up where you are merely waiting to clothe her or relieve her of her soiled pants.  And I don't even want to begin to tell you how many times a day we go through this! The funny thing is while she is doing this and I am calling her name and she is chuckling and all the while I am in various stages of laughing, amused, bored, irritated, exasperated, exhausted and well, let's say, just plain had it!  The other day I said to her, "Hey, you sure do take the long way round to listening!" 

Then as I started to put her clothes on her the words I had said rang loudly in my ears.  So, my dear darling daughter, do you.  How often does my heavenly father sit perfectly still on the floor in the middle of the room while I move darting around in circles, taking my own time to do things, to listen and obey.  I have been struggling with my health for over a decade.  I have had major major setbacks along the road, I have struggled with hurt and blame and scars emotional and literal that have left me reeling and I think there were definitely things I thought were unfairly done to me that weren't my fault and therefore I should not be left to pick up the broken pieces and put everything back together. The point however wasn't that I was wronged, which I was, or that if modern medicine fails you in it's imperfectness that you just lie down in a ditch and watch a decade of your life pass you by.  I have definitely taken the long way round to listening.  Even though my circumstances are tough, I don't want living in unhealthy life to be the end of my story.  And I know that is not what the Lord wants for me either.  Even if I do this blog just for myself and a few family members who read it I feel that God wants me to use this as a chance to grow and change and I am enjoying being obedient to that call!  For those of you who have read the non-fiction classic Love Language book by Gary Chapman you are familiar with the concept of finding what your spouses love language is and learning to speak their language. So if your spouse best understands love by spending quality time with someone make sure you make lots of special date night time for them and so on.   Well I have long felt that God's love language is obedience.   In John 14:15 God says "If you love me, keep my commands." He couldn't spell it out for us any clearer than that could he? And of course we know great is our reward as Romans 8:28 says "And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose."  What more incentive do we need to be obedient to God?  I challenge you tonight to search your hearts for his voice, calling to you as an ever patient parent, while as defiant toddlers we circle the room holding parts of our heart just out reach of his transforming power. I can picture in my mind's eye that there is a snapshot tucked safely in one of my parent's photo albums of a young Amanda, probably 3 at the most, running up ahead not looking back not waiting for anyone not listening I am sure to her parents who were calling her back.  My Mom says I was always running ahead.  But sooner or later we have to stop running.  God is calling us back, so he can show us the way that he wants us to go.  For those of you who like me are sick of taking the long way round to listening, let's give our ears God's full attention and turn our hearts over to his leading.  And how precious to know that by being obedient we are so lavishing our love back on him!

 I'll leave you tonight with an image of my former spunky toddlerness, with my Daddy! Totally 80's Right?? Love it! Thanks for reading everyone please keep up the feedback, comments and inviting others to join us!


  1. Oh loves, I love your word pictures. That's just how God speaks to me too. I needed to hear this tonight. You are inspiring me. Thank you.

  2. One of the best parts about being a parent is that we can relate to our Heavenly Father in a new way. I bet little Soph wasn't amused that she was in mad and in time out and you were snapping photos of her. The whole scene plays in my mind and makes me smile. Love you!

  3. Oh this is a blessing to me. I spent some time praying for you this weekend. I was on a women's retreat and have actually been looking forward to getting back to read your blog. I love you and am proud of you and the ways that you are obeying and sharing your journey.