And I am a go-big or go-home kind of girl. So with all these roadblocks I kept saying...some day. Some day I will blog again. Some day. When my husband isn't recovering from surgery. When I am not pregnant for the third time. When I am not building a house while living with my parents. When I am not pregnant for the fourth time. Some day....
Turns out, I'm fed up with waiting for some day. I have done some cool stuff in the last few years, made some good recipes, had some good big ideas and went through some emotional stuff and felt like I could have shared it with the world if I hadn't been waiting for some day. So I guess I am declaring today....SOME DAY!!!!
I hate my inner struggle to follow through. This blog has always served as accountability for me. It matters little if anyone reads it, makes any recipes from it, follows any exercise advice, gleans any spiritual insight etc. It matters that I am being open and being me. I have so struggled the last three years with feeling like people don't like who I am and that in fact means I should change who I am. The sticking point there is that then I wouldn't be me. The enemy always seems to know right where I get stuck, I want to please people and be well liked. I want to be able to focus on the things I like about myself and not the things I don't. I can be pretty funny sometimes. I am certainly dramatic. I am overly sensitive to my own hurts and the hurts of others which I try to utilize for being an empathetic person. I am altogether far too introspective which leans toward sadness, anxiety and doubt. I am creative, I enjoy writing, cooking, photography, crafting. For better or worse, these things are me. My ultimate goal in this life is to serve God with my time and my talents in the place that he has me. Sometimes that means in the home, as a mom, cooking, cleaning, teaching my kids the values our family holds important. Sometimes that means in my job, helping people with their pain, giving them tough love and encouragement to follow through with their therapy, being there for them to help them get through a difficulty both emotionally and physically. Sometimes that is as a wife, supporting my husband in his endeavors, pulling extra weight in his absence or weaknesses, and loving him unconditionally.
I have had this blog on my mind for months. Our pastor has been doing a sermon series on my absolute favorite book of the bible; Philippians. Every week we ended with a benediction that I have had memorized since I was a young girl. And every week it reminded me of something that I struggle with, holding on to anxiousness and my own perception of control rather than doing the most effective thing; thanking, praying and asking God for help in everything. The title of this blog, of course also from Philippians highlights the fact that I indeed recognize, "not that I have already obtained all this....but I press on!" One thing I know, whether or not I have anything to say and whether or not I have anyone to listen, I was a happier, better me when I was blogging so I am getting back in the saddle.
A new summer series:
The Travis Family Sensational Summer of Six! - Getting ready for some time at home with a new baby, my last baby, I decided to go over the top making this a summer to remember. There will be weekly themes with activities, crafts, recipes, books all designed for having an amazing summer as a family.
Our families new way of handling rules and chores also some new habits we are going to instill for the benefit of us all.
New baby new room!
Maybe by the time he arrives our baby boy will have an awesome nursery to come home to! Things are moving a little slow in that department. Stay tuned, I'm hoping that the nursery is a homerun....
Last baby, time to get serious:
Craig and I are going to attempt a new undertaking post-partum! (I'm kind of forcing him to do it with me he is hoping it isn't too girly being Jillian!)
Finally for any that haven't heard I had started a new undertaking last fall, called Make Ahead Magic, a cooking group in my home for freezer meals. Our sixth and last pre-baby session is coming up and I plan to use the blog in the future to come up with ideas and showcase what works and doesn't with freezer cooking.
So lots to keep me busy and keep me blogging. So look out world, I'm back....
Loved your blog and your determination to make the most of your summer. Nate has totally done Jillian with me many times and thinks it is tough and not girly. I would love to make meals with you, but don't want to have a bunch we couldn't eat. Lets talk about that sometime... Love you, so glad you are back at it.
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